Insult of the Week: You’re a Duck-Fornicating Heathen!

Insult of the Week: You’re a Duck-Fornicating Heathen!

Today’s insult comes from the novel Tai-Pan, written by James Clavell. The novel’s hero, Dirk Straun, calls out to a Chinese sailor:

“You’re a duck-fornicating heathen!”

The insult involves a little research. As rumor has it, some Chinese men like to fornicate with their pet ducks. The fetish was described in the quintessential study on human sexuality—Paolo Mantegazza’s, The Sexual Relations of Mankind. Mantegazza noted that Chinese men would receive fellatio from their pet ducks, even going so far as to strangulate them before ejaculation.

Now I have no way to confirm or deny these rumors. That being said, I think that it’s an appropriate moment for a culinary offering.

Peking duck anyone?

peking-dick
“Let’s get it on…” *Sung in Marvin Gaye style*

 

Insult of the Week

Insult of the Week

The following insult comes from Crime and Punishment. Katerina Ivanovna—one of the novel’s main characters—yells the following to her landlady:

“And you too?” she suddenly saw the landlady, “…you trashy Prussian hen’s leg in a crinoline!”

Excellent! That’s how they insult people in the the old country. But I confess that I was confused, so I went to Google for a gander:

Here’s a Prussian hen’s leg:

921a085dfac0a1c59379085fd3d16904
Picture a woman with legs like this

And here’s a crinoline:

4-1860-crinoline-dress-for-ge
…in a dress like this.

Now I get it.

It’s great to peek into history; we can see a place without political correctness. It’s a world where you can insult somebody, and you won’t get banned from Twitter.